So, i was working from home today when the Sri Lankan housekeeper, Fatima walked in. After she'd busied herself with the cleaning and mopping and washing, she sat down next to me and asked for a favor. here's what become of a conversation that changed my normal day into an abnormal one:
Fatima: Can you help me go to the internet? i have important news from home that i need to check. i've been asking my son to help me, but he's been busy you know? He's busy working and then at night he runs around with his gang.
v: Sure, what do you want me to look up for?
Fatima: *Now eyes wide open and whisper in a hushed tone* Can you look for 'The grease devil in Sri Lanka?'
v: Huh? What devil?
Fatima: Shhhh... *putting finger to lips* GREEEASE devil. you know, this devil comes in a form of a man covered in grease (now orang minyak from one of those P. Ramlee movies came to mind) and he's been running around in rural Sri Lanka biting woman on their neck and their chest (seriously, the chest? Erghh, this must be one little pervy ghost) and then steals their goods. My sister told me she almost got attacked last week but she was lucky because she managed to get up and scream for help. Ya Allah, may God protect her. *she started tearing up now*
v: Huh? Hmmm.. Okay... Why? *now googling GREASE DEVIL SRI LANKA*
But Fatima, you know that ghost doesn't exist right? And even if they do, i don't think they are allowed to harm human beings, like physically. Maybe these are just thieves who wants to dramatize their little outings.
We had a back and forth talk about how this is real and unreal- the more i tried to console her and tell her that this is all made up, the more hysterical she becomes.
Now, how do you explain to someone that she has no reason to worry about her relatives because really, these ghost aren't really running around trying to bite them in their chest and neck? How do i tell her that instead of buying books and books of Quran and storing them under every pillow in the house, they should start buying bigger padlocks? How do i tell her that if there is anything she should be worried about, it would be mortals rather than spirits? And with all her arguments, she'd totally poison my food if i told her that her sister was probably too terrified of all these stories that she was starting to imagine things. (you callin' my sister crazy now, you bitch? lols)
In the end, i zipped my little mouth because really, what's the point? sometimes, when people believe in something, so bad, no amount of logical explanation is ever going to change anything, anyway.
So this is what i think: the grease devil or the orang minyak isn't real. As much as there is no amount of convincing that can convince Fatima about the non-existence of these ghosts, it isn't gonna convinced me the other way round either: unless, until proven otherwise :)
4 comments:
grease eh. i would suggest a lighter under the pillow.
feel righteous fire, perv!
omg, you have TOTALLY solved the problem!
i am gonna tell Fatima tomorrow that i've consulted a tok bomoh from Malaysia and he told me to keep lighters under the pillow and when the ghost comes around, just light em up! GREASE DEVILS are scared of fire! LOLS
How'd ya like to move to Sri Lanka and become a famous tok bomoh?
i'd stick to KL, tq. orang minyak sini lagi friendly. :p
this story moves around the region in different variations la. I heard a similar one in Mumbai once and i just told the feller in Malaysia we had the same thing but found out it was just normal thieves who greased themselves with oil so it was hard to catch them. i just used the reference that it was no big thing in KL - also made a joke that they ran around nekkid with their willies all oiled up...
and yes, that lighter would REALLY help!
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